Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Put your big girl panties on and deal with it.

I am going off to college soon, and I was discussing dorm needs with my mother earlier. There are the obvious-- sheets, shower caddy, backpack, and so forth. There was one more thing:
"Mom," I said "I don't think Hanes 6-packs are going to cut it anymore. I'm going to be living with a new roommate, and my undergarments need to make a good impression. I think it's time I started wearing big girl panties."
To be honest with you, I've never found a truly satisfactory pair of underwear. They're all uncomfortable or boring or ugly or too big or too small or cut into my hips or have too much fabric in the back or too much elastic. To be honest with you, I don't quite know how to remedy the situation. I mean, everyone tells me a quality pair of underwear will be waiting for me at Victoria's Secret, but I am just not feeling like I want to pay fourteen dollars for three ounces of fabric, ya dig? Especially three ounces that say ADORABLE!!! or SASSYPANTSMCGEE or LOVE'N'KISSES on the butt.


Cosmo declared the thong dead recently (do you remember that?), but I'm not really that concerned with what that magazine has to say about my underwear. However, thongs do not seem fun. Nor do the "boyshorts" Cosmo is now trying to sell to me-- what if I want my underwear to stay outside of my body? Is that so much to ask?!
The thing that is really remarkable to me is the selection-- there are at least 3000 different kinds of basic cotton underwear, and then there is the incredible realm of foundation garments... it boggles the mind, really. I think it's very interesting that Spanx (is that what they're called? I think they must have assigned an intern to name this product.) are coming into vogue-- didn't we decide not to wear corsets a few years ago? The interesting thing is that they are marketed as a revolutionary new idea-- imagine! Undergarments that make you appear slimmer!
I guess I am mainly just confused. What underwear does a grown-up girl buy?

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Some skinny pretty girl who likes to talk about bands

Today, I was going to go to their concert. Unfortunately, things didn't work out as planned, but I've got them on the brain. They are a very tricky wardrobe situation, because concerts can be quite taxing but are full of people who demand impressive clothing. And, of course, we can't ignore the possibility of serendipitously meeting the dishiest member of the band and then getting married to him or her. Or whatever. So what's a girl to do?

Here are the necessities for a really packed, impossibly hot and sweaty and moshy type of a concert:


1: Don't accessorize.

That's right, I said it. I once made the mistake of bringing a purse and a faux fur stole to a Modest Mouse concert, and I really wish I hadn't-- it's just an extra thing to carry around. Jewelry is okay, but only if it's very hearty, because you might lose it.


2: Wear tough-girl shoes.

I'm sure you can guess the specific kind I'm thinking of. Unless, of course, you want black and blue toenails and for one of your sandals to join the random shoes littered on the floor after the show.


3: Wear something cool.

Even if it's snowing outside, just think of how you'll feel once you're packed in a tiny subterranean room with 100000 sweaty bodies falling all over you.


4: Leave your hair down.

You know that fantastic post-concert hair, where it gets all wavy and disheveled, like you've been having sex on the beach? (at least, that's what I imagine it's like...) If your hair is up, it will end up all sorts of ridiculous, but leave it down and ready to be influenced, and you can start the next day with a Sharpie X on your hand, rings under your eyes, and a little bit of extra street cred.


5: Look really hip.

I know, I know, this goes against everything else I've said. But don't forget about the potential rock star encounter. *wink*


6: Wear earplugs.

Hearing stuff the next day is cool! Even if you look a little bit lame.


7: Bring an extra brassiere.

Or be willing to sacrifice the one you have on-- you'll want an undergarment to throw onstage, right?

Monday, July 26, 2010

you make me wanna say OH OH OH OH OH OH OH MY GOSH.

Dear Miz Mooz,
Could you get any better? I mean, not only do they have an awesome blog, but...but...look at their SHOES!



(these are my favorite because they remind me of these Swedish Hasbeens, which I loooove).

Okay, so not only do they have ADORABLE pumps, they have....boots.



YOUR HEAD A SPLOAD.
See, there's really nothing I want more than a good, flat, every-day kind of ankle/mid-calf boot.
Sigh. But almost all of Miz Mooz shoes (they probably did that on purpose, that's why I love them soo much) cost anywhere from $50 to $150, and my spending range is somewhere from $5 to $15 (Value Village is the best).

So sadly, I will never own these.
WAHHHHHHHH.

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Swimming Soup.

What greater challenge is there in life that finding the perfect swimsuit? Particularly when your tummy is more substantial than your wallet, for a really flattering swimsuit takes a lot of excellent engineering and the finest materials available. My theory is that the folks in the 1950's had the right idea-- earlier on, ladies got arrested for indecent exposure for bearing their arms and legs on beaches, and the burkaesque swimming dresses of the time don't seem hydrodynamic, per se.

 Later on, Twiggy was around, spreading her curveless influence and all was lost. 


(Twiggy does the skinny thing well, I don't do it at all.)
What I'm saying, I guess, is that maybe the pinups knew how to do it in the era before 98 lbs. was the ideal weight. Therefore, I have spent a great deal of time in recent years seeking the perfect, Monroeish swimsuit-- something like this: 


Or maybe this: 
(Uh, is that Posh Spice? Maybe.) 

The problem is that there is not enough demand for such things for there to be reasonably priced versions of things like this, but as soon as there is, they will lose at least 42% of their allure. Story of my life, though. So far, I've found versions of these on Daddy-O's and at ModCloth




Naturally, those were all lots of money, so my temporary, mejum-satisfying solution comes from Old Navy and looks like this: 

(As I said, mejum.)

The bottom line? Perhaps swimsuits are more trouble than they're worth-- maybe the best solution is none at all... 

one dress, three ways

Okay, I know I haven't been a very reliable blogger. But I got up this morning and thought "I'll make a giant post today to kick-start my new blog regimen." So here goes.

The is a dress I got at H&M in a sale a while back. It's a navy-blue, jersey tank dress with a scoopneck. It's simple, comfy, and cute.

(sorry about my face/hair, I decided to take all the pictures this morning so I didn't have to deal with crazy wet hair.)

This first look is something I wore last week to see Eclipse with some of my friends. Despite the fact that it was the first day of July, I live in Seattle and Seattle summers only begin after the Fourth of July. So it was about 56 degrees and cloudy.


dress: H&M
vest: Gap
cardigan: Target
I love that vest. My favorite thing about this look is that it's kind of sporty and yet cute at the same time. I'm forever trying to find a happy medium between the two.
(I also originally wore this with black tights and boots, but it was toooo hot to put those on. It's the seventh of July, so naturally it's 89 degrees today.)
The next look is kind of a spring-y way to wear this dress. I like that it looks like a cute little jumper, in kind of a little-kid way. I always try to make myself look younger because people always confuse me with my college-aged sister. Annoying.

shirt: Target

The last look is my favorite and the most summery of all the ensembles (I love using that word in relation to clothes).


scarf: my mom's
belt: off a dress from Salvage Life

silly.

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Benjamin Blümchen.

So, I was sitting in my dining room today. My family had gone for a picnic in the mountains and I was staying home with my little brother (who was sleeping when they left) and working on these painfully boring driver's ed videos (because I WILL have a license before I turn eighteen! I promise!) I was sitting, "watching" these videos and gazing out the window at our lovely and unkempt flower garden. Why is it that flowers are so lovely? And, indeed, why are florals so captivating? I love how versatile they are-- that is, they can be used as a shout-out to so many different cultural movements, and can be delivered with either delicious irony or complete sincerity, all depending on the level on which the accessories juxtapose. Every time they seem like they're outdated, some brilliant mind comes up with something like this, at all is saved.

(Did I mention that I'm obsessed with Doc Martens? Yes? OK good.) 

Polka-dots, plaids, stripes may come and go, but something about florals just keeps us coming back to reinvent, ever enchanted by their feminine magic
Oh, Dior... 

Thursday, June 10, 2010

The Hills are Alive

My favorite movie in the whole world is the Sound of Music. It is so freaking good. Also, it's got some really fabulous clothing, such as: 

This dress is probably my favorite thing in the whole movie-- it's hard to convey in an image, but it moves so beautifully. And this dude's suit? Adorable! 


The Baroness may be a super-biotch, but she certainly knows how to dress herself.


I've already mentioned my weakness for Lederhosen, yes? And I love a good Drindl.


Clothing made of drapes? Divine! 


I always secretly wanted to be a nun. Wearing a habit would probably get itchy and hot and unbearable, but for the first 10-11 seconds it might be fun.


Oh, Captain von Trapp. He is a complete and total dish, am I right? I love those lapels.

"I'm sure you'll make a very fine nun."-- do you think Carrie Bradshaw drew some inspiration from this beautiful golden ball gown? I hope so. 

I love all of the Austrian flavor going on in the movie, all of the sassy Z-snap moments ("You flatter me, sir." "Oh how clumsy of me-- I meant to accuse you!"), the Alps and Julie's voice.